Random Pictures

These are some pictures from a walk in the Blue Hills State Reservation a few weeks ago...we've got Buca and Indie, of course, and a picture of one playground that we will definitely be taking our kids to.

Buca Boy


Indie Pooh


Let's Play

More of Isabella's Closet

I love this dress, which is one of the few I have bought personally. I can't wait to see her wearing this. Bring on that baby!!!

Giving in on the nursery trim

Well, last night Tim and I decided we are definitely re-painting the nursery trim! It just doesn't work, no matter how much I try to like it. Carla slept over last night after a long day of work...she decided to stay with us rather than drive all the way home. She saw the nursery, and when Tim asked her what she thought of the trim, she responded "I don't know". Well, that was it! Carla's very sweet, so that's basically a "Hate it!"

We are keeping the wall color though, which we love. So, I need a trim color that works with the "John Lennon Real Love" Collection from Carter's and the orange and blue Chinese symbol bedding set we bought, and the existing yellow walls. We are currently thinking of blue, green, or purple. And it's not like we don't have TIME before Isabella comes home. So, it looks like I will be taking my Benjamin Moore "Sand" paint chip, and my John Lennon Real Love border, to the Drive-By Paint Mart in Dorchester.

No word from the USCIS yet...

I try to always end on a positive note ... i.e. NOT "I hate the nursery trim" or "Damn that USCIS approval". So, even though this is not my good news, I'll share it, because I think all of the Slap and Duffala friends and family know by now, and Andy and Nicole know I have a big mouth that is rarely shut. Andy and Nicole are going to have a little girl!!! Her name will be "Abigail Elizabeth". Absolutely beautiful...thank God it's a girl..."Abigail Elizabeth" is much nicer than "Nigel" or "Horace". I don't know what Nicole was thinking, marrying the Slapster. Congratuations to Andy and Nicole, and we can't wait to meet Abigail!!!

Cautiously Optimistic...

OK, so I put an inquiry out there on the Internet as to how the Boston USCIS field office was doing processing I-171H forms (INS approvals). A man in Arlington, MA that is also using CAWLI, our adoption agency, wrote that his family was fingerprinted on 9/17 and his family was approved today! So my hope is that since Tim and I sent in our homestudy update on 9/19, and our prints should already be there, we may get our approval by the end of the week. At least we are really hoping so!

In other news, I have been sick. This adoption stuff is wearing me down! Just kidding. More like my usual battles with allergies. I am planning on heading back to work tomorrow, although I dread thinking about how much I have to catch up on. Oh well, enough complaining for now!

A baby shower for LaSalette and John...

Today I went to a baby shower that Cheryl and Bruce had for LaSalette and John, who are leaving mid-October to bring home Emma! It was pretty exciting to watch this mom opening their gifts after their long journey. Bruce and John went to Foxwoods to escape the "ooohing" and "aaahing". Tim was invited, but decided to stay home and work. And sleep. He's making gourmet pizza right now. How did I land this husband? Do I tell him how wonderful he is enough?

I toured Emma's nursery, which is beautiful! What was scary was the two suitcases on the floor, heaped with all the baby supplies they need to take with them! And the clothes weren't even in there yet! Yikes. I am lucky in that both couples will be going to China before me, so I can learn from them. I also saw Cheryl and Bruce's new nursery furniture for Mya and it is so pretty.

Now, when you go to someone else's shower, you are not supposed to get a gift. But I found out that Carla, Cheryl & Bruce, and LaSalette & John have all been on the hunt for about TWO MONTHS for an Asian Cabbage Patch Baby Girl to buy for Tim and me. Wow! They gave it to me this afternoon...I've posted a sample picture. Cabbage Patch dolls are now much cuter than they were when I was a kid. I am really overwhelmed by my friendships lately. Cheryl and Bruce bought the doll for us, and gave us a beautiful card to express their regret at the setbacks we have and how they look forward to our daughters playing together. Wow, wow, wow. I feel very undeserving ... I wonder if I've whined too much. I feel speechless. I really don't know what to say except "thanks for keeping the dream alive". Our daughter will have two Chinese-American friends in the city I grew up in. How amazing is that? And how amazing are these friends we have?

TGIF!

For some reason, I am really tired today. So, TGIF! Maybe Buca and Indie will let us sleep in a bit in the morning.

Guess what Tim came home with the other night? An inflatable wading pool for Bella! Very exciting...he got it free on Craig's List. It has a very cute pattern and I can't wait to see a baby girl splashing around in it.

We had dinner the other night with 4 other couples who are also adopting children from China: Cheryl and Bruce, LaSalette and John, and two couples LaSalette and John know-Angie and her husband, and Karen and Alex. All the other couples are ahead of us in the process...they are all "waiting families", which we won't technically be until we are DTC. LaSalette and John are leaving for China on October 15th, and will soon be bringing Emma home. Hurray!!!

I have more good news. There was a couple adopting in China recently that found out their daughter had pneumonia on "Gotcha Day"...the daughter, Gwen, had been in the hospital the previous week. Gwen continued to have trouble breathing and was dehydrated for the first part of their time together in China as a new family. But she's on the mend now, and she and her family are flying home from Hong Kong today. I am so relieved for this beautiful family. Congratulations to Scott, Karen and Baby Gwen!!! You can read their blog by clicking on the sidebar link under "Other Adoption Blogs". Gwen is too precious...

The Nursery...In Progress!

Ok, so the nursery is totally in progress. But some early pictures...

The door...because Carla bought the Chinese welcome sign...



One of the two closets that is in her room. This closet has a whole bunch of cubby holes built right in. Very cool.


One window...no curtains yet, so I just hung a musical Panda toy we bought for the time being...


The other window. Here I hung the diaper stackers from the two sets of bedding I've bought ... one is orange and blue with Chinese symbols and a panda theme, and the other is the John Lennon Real Love Collection, which has elephants, giraffes, and rhinos. I wanted to see how the colors would work. Also, I hung the panda scroll I bought from ChinaSprout.com.


Isabella's bookshelves-here you see a stuffed Bichon Frise "Indie" and a stuffed Schnauzer "Buca", some books, some bookends from the Real Love Collection, a Sonya Lee doll, and an "I" for Isabella from the Classic Pooh Collection. Both the Sonya Lee doll and the "I" were gifts from LaSalette and John. You also see three stuffed toys from the John Lennon Real Love Collection...a rhino, a kangeroo and her joey, and an elephant.


And here are close-ups of "Indie" and "Buca", just waiting for Bella to come home!

Some of the new clothes....

Ok, this babe is totally spoiled already. But, if the clothes don't fit I can always either give them to another family in our travel group, or donate them to the Social Welfare Institute (the orphanage). I've gotten some great deals on brand new clothes on ebay. I'll start with the clothes I've bought.

The ladybug outfit. Cause it has a hat and a cute baby girl needs a hat. And I still cannot get over how totally adorable baby bloomers are.



And this blue and white gingham dress, again, mostly because it has bloomers!


Now for the gifts she has received ... and there have been many. This is just a few ... I still have to take some more pictures!

From Cheryl and Bruce, who are also adopting from China...

A cute pink polo dress and an adorable yellow sundress:




From LaSalette and John, who are traveling to China in October to bring home their daughter Emma, Isabella has been given a Winnie the Pooh Romper:


And from Chris, some funky tights from Germany...


We are very grateful and happy to see people embracing this adoption so much!!!

Finally...pictures

I finally got a roll of pictures developed. God, I hate conventional film...digital is SO easy.

Anyway, the first picture is of us with our friends Irwin and Nicole in August, when we were still in the DC area.

Nicole is now a fellow at the National Institutes of Health. Isn't she beautiful???Her partner is Rich, a cute funny red headed guy. They are both microbiologists. Unfortunately, Rich was busy working that night and could not join us. I especially like talking to Rich because a.) he's funny, and b.) he's red-headed. Just kidding. Maybe. But seriously, he knows a lot about economics and likes dogs. What else is there?

Irwin is an engineer, and is continuing his fellowship at EPA. Since his wife Nina is actually a professor at Umass-Boston, Irwin is working out of the Region I area here in Boston now. This is great for us, as we will still get to see them! Nina and Irwin have been married for a long time ... almost 30 years and they are a real inspiration. And if I could pick a dad, I'd pick Irwin.



The next picture is Tim, posing with some "Baby Bella" mushrooms in the grocery store. We think this is funny...but of course, we don't really want to eat our daughter!!!

Sleepless Again

Well, I woke up at 2:30 am, and here I am at 5:25 am. Couldn't sleep. As those of you close to me know, I have an insomnia problem from time to time, and the adoption process hasn't made this any easier.

So what is it this time?

The hope and the excitement that we may actually finally be DTC in October?

The worries about how we can finance updates to this beautiful but old home while also financing the adoption?

The worries about me being up for 4th year review at the University? And then tenure decision year in two years (assuming I pass 4th year review!)

The worries about my aging grandmom, who has been in and out of the hospital this week?

The worries about finding a way to balance family and work life, and do well at both?

The worries that once we bring this beautiful, precious child home I'll have a hard time returning to work, especially if she has a hard time adjusting to her new home and family, or has severe separation anxiety?

The worries that nothing will compare to what Isabella needs, but yet we will still need my income to give her the life she deserves?

The worries about an adoptive couple that is in China now with their first child, a sick little baby girl?

One thing I know. The only thing I ever felt that I had to be in life was a mother. Don't get me wrong...I love being a professor and I love being a wife. But I think I could have been very happy without being either of those things. But without being a mother, I would always feel as though I didn't become the person that I was supposed to be.

When I read our homestudy update earlier, the social worker has written something like "Tammy and Tim are clearly ready to parent through adoption". Now, this may be a standard line in all her concluding paragraphs for favorable homestudy updates, but I read that line and thought:

Yes.

We are ready. We may not know everything or even most things, and I am sure as we actually become parents a lot of what we thought we'd do will fly out the window. But we are ready.

Good news!!!

First, I want to share that Tim and I assembled our kitchen island last night and all survived (me, Tim and the island)! Here is a sample picture from the website where we orderd it.

Second, we spent the morning in "Babies 'r Us". We bought some shower gifts for two friends. Today we walked over to Sumeet and John to give them their gifts ... they live one street over from us and are expecting a baby in November. I took the opportunity to point out to Tim some of the items we should buy for Isabella ... for example, the Britax Marathon car seat, which can be used rear facing when she's small and forward facing when she's a bit bigger. It gets great reviews in the "Baby Bargains" book, which Sumeet let me borrow from her. I like to let Tim think he has a say in some of these things!

Finally, the best news ... we got our homestudy update in the mail!!! Hurray!!! It goes off to USCIS/INS, Boston field office, and we begin waiting for the I-171H once again. Hopefully they will give it to us this time!!!

One more step closer...

Tim and I had our homestudy update visit last night! Our social worker's name is Jo, and it sounds like she will also do the 6 and 12 month post placement visits when Isabella comes home. The visit was pretty short - we answered some questions about the home, and then she walked around all the rooms. Unfortunately, we had to show her our room of unpacked and miscellaneous junk, which is the "guest room". She did say that she liked the nursery colors, which was nice to hear, but perhaps she was just being polite?

Jo said that she should have the HS update to me by the beginning of next week. I will then send it to the Boston USCIS office, along with a letter of explanation, and then hopefully we will finally get the coveted I-171H INS approval. I also need to take some pictures of this home to include in the dossier. I just emailed our adoption agency to make sure that, other than those two items, our ducks are in a row. As soon as the I-171H comes in, I want the dossier to be whisked off for authentication, and then to China! Truth be told, I am a bit paranoid at this stage in the game.

In other news ...
Isabella got another present! Our friends Andy and Nicole (see their picture posted on 6/4) were mortified after seeing the skull dress Tim bought Isabella (see this posted on 8/1), and bought her the cutest lilac gingham dress, which has a great little hat. And it's sized 24 months, which is good because most of the clothes we've gotten or have been given are in the 6-12 month range, so this will fit her during her second summer with us, or maybe during her first if she's older or a larger baby. This kid is going to be stylin'. Andy and Nicole also bought me some Caswell-Massey soaps! We are very blessed with generous friends. Andy and Nicole are expecting a baby in February, and I cannot wait to spoil their little one. Andy is suggesting the name "Nigel" or "Horace" for a boy, but I am pretty sure Nicole won't let hm get away with that craziness!

A busy, busy weekend!

Tim and I finished painting Isabella's nursery on Saturday, although we still have a bit of touch up work to do. It felt so good to put her things in there! My dear friend Carla will soon help me put up a border, and of course, we need baby furniture. But her closet has her little outfits in it. There are books on her bookshelves, and her stuffed animals and Sonya Lee doll are also on her shelves. She has a stuffed Bichon Frise puppy, an "Indie", and a stuffed schnauzer puppy, a "Buca". I also hung up her panda scroll. Now all I need is my dear Isabella!

Tomorrow we have our homestudy update visit, so today we tried to really straighten things up. Tim said I was in "overdrive" and stressing him out. On this coming Friday, we will have been in the house a month, and I always want things to be done NOW. It's quite a bad trait of mine. We unpacked some more boxes, and assembled a copper cookware stand we have bought. I dusted and vacuumed, Tim did groceries. Tonight we will bathe the dogs. The house, with the exception of the "guest room" where all unpacked, unorganized items reside, looks nice, cozy, comfortable. I know that, but I guess I feel like there is so much I don't know. How long will it take to write the home study update? How long to get the I-171H from the Boston office? Will some of our paperwork expire? When we will finally be DTC? Has our daughter been born yet? If so, is she being taken care of? Does she know love?

I feel very emotional these days. I kept walking into the nursery over and over again last night. Sometimes I feel silly. We still have a long road ahead of us, and a lot could go wrong.

Little things seem big. For example, the trim color in the nursery came out differently than I had hoped. I wanted a feminine, restful beige, but when the overhead light is on, it looks more pink than I would like. Tim doesn't like it, although he does love the color of the walls, as do I. I cried because I very much want all to be just so for her and I want to feel proud ... like I've done my very best to give her a beautiful home and a beautiful life. I hate overhead lights anyway, and would probably never use the overhead, but its effect on the nursery bothered me. I do think the trim color will do a good job of pulling in the colors of her bedding sets and the border though, so we'll see. Maybe I'll get a grip!

No new news...but new things!

This past weekend, Tim and I began painting Isabella's nursery. It was remarkable peaceful, i.e., we are both still alive and actually speaking to each other! This weekend we will finish it up. The walls are what Tim calls a "honey dijon" color and Benjamin Moore calls "straw". I'll call them kind of a golden yellow color. The trim is a color Benjamin Moore calls "Soft Satin". It's an odd color ... a kind of beige/light pink. I wanted the nursery to be pretty neutral in color, so that it would work with both of Bella's bedding sets. We'll see! When we are done, I'll take some pictures and post. Unfortunately, our digital camera is not working well these days.

Classes at the University started this week, so I am back in the classroom, teaching two microeconomics classes and one statistics class. I had lunch with my friend Chris Bobel yesterday. Chris teaches women's studies and just returned from a summer in Germany. She is also the author of a book called "The Paradox of Natural Mothering".

Chris is a mom to Gracie and Zoe. Very precious girls. Chris bought Isabella some things from Germany...a pair of funky pink striped tights and a collection of ocean themed wooden toys! Very cute!!!

"Babywearing", or carrying your baby next to your body in a carrier that ties to your body in some way, is strongly recommended for children in general, and previously institutionalized adopted children in particular. I have just ordered my first carrier, a mei tai, which is a traditional Asian Baby Carrier. I ordered it at Angel Baby: www.angelbabyslings.com. So get this, I check out the fabrics (they are beautiful, by the way), and I see one called "Bella". Well, that was it! Here's a clip of the fabric:

I can't wait until it comes in! Perhaps I can convince Buca or Indie to let me test drive it on them!!!

An appointment for the HS update!!!

We have finally connected with the social worker that will do our homestudy update! The appointment is for September 12, at 6pm. Hurray!!! Maybe we can still be October DTC...a few weeks to get the USCIS/INS approval from the Boston office, and a few weeks for authentication of our dossier. We would likely then get a referral at the end of April or May. There I go speculating again. Bad Tammy. I am really hoping to have most of the summer with Isabella though...since I am going on leave for the Fall 2006 semester, I am hoping for a good six months at home with Baby Bella. Sometimes Tim and I buy these pre-sliced portabella mushrooms from the grocery store that say "Baby Bella" on them, and I always point that out to him and laugh.

The funny thing is that in our new neighborhood, there is a pitbull named Bella living right across the street! She seems NONE too friendly, but I think she's just sick and tired of being tied up outside most of the day. I always say "It's OK, Bella", whenever I walk our monsters, Indie and Buca. Speaking of Buca, he has this none too adorable new habit in this new house...he runs up the stairs in the morning, jumps on the bed, and wakes me up by licking my face and sticking his tongue in my mouth. Next week, when classes start, and I'm up first, I will be curious to see how much Tim likes it, assuming Buca does the same to him.

To celebrate this tiny step of actually having an appt. for the HS update, I ordered this panda scroll from www.chinasprout.com. We will hang it in isabella's nursery.



They have the neatest things, and will even let you save a wish list. I love the scroll!

So I told Tim we should try to have the nursery painted for our HS update appointment. Of course, it's not required or necessary, but it's good to have goals! Plus, I'd like to put out Isabella's books and the Sonya Lee doll.

Work continues on the attic/my office space to be. It looks very nice, and I can't wait to get set up there.

Last night our friends John and Sumeet, who live one street over, came over for dinner...which was nice and relaxing. Tim and I needed that! John and Sumeet are expecting a baby in November, and we are very excited about that.

Well, that's all for now!