Ten Bits About Bella.

1. She is teething something fierce. She spends at least half the day with her hands in her mouth. It doesn't help that she hates having teething gel massaged on her gums. She also hates having teething tablets that have been dissolved in water put in her mouth.

2. When she's in a good mood, she loves to make all kinds of noises with her mouth...she puckers and makes clicking and sucking sounds. Yesterday, she started babbling spontaneously. She sounds like what I imagine a Teradactyl would sound like.

3. Yesterday we had a "free" day...no structured activities, so we took her to the hotel swimming pool. At first she was a little unsure, but then she seemed to enjoy it. You can hold her by her middle, and she paddles her arms. She hasn't figured out the leg thing yet, but I wouldn't be surprised if she learns to swim very quickly. SK says her little one piece brown floral tank is the most revealing swim suit she's ever allowed to wear. He has started singing "Burkaville".

4. She smiled at us quite a bit on Forever Family Day, but I think that is because she didn't relize she was leaving her nanny and getting stuck with us. On Days 2, 3, 4, and 5 with her, there were no smiles....just serious cotemplation and mild curiousity about us. On Day 6, she started smiling, laughing, and giggling. She makes us feel like a million bucks.

5. At first, she refused to eat. She went completely nuts when anything went near her mouth. Then she went through a phase when all she liked is amoxicillin in a oral suspension liquid (although she still screamed when the medicine dropper came near her mouth), which the doctor traveling with us prescribed for a possible ear infection. Finally, she has begun eating. We stopped giving her what the orphanage instructed us to, substituting whole grain rice cereal for the rice powder that she had at the orphanage. At first we cut a large hole in her bottle nipple, but once she started feeding well, we went to a much smaller hole to make sure she develops her mouth muscles (the latest size hole is only slightly bigger than the hole in a fast flow Playtex rubber nipple). She still isn't interested in any kind of solid food though, including Cheerios and fruit puffs. SHe wants absolutely nothing to do with congee. Once, she almost ate a bit of steamed egg, but I think it will be a bit before she gets comfortable with solid food.

6. She loves to look at herself in the mirror. She takes after Baba that way!

7. I think she has big feet for her body. I thought for sure she would take a size 2 shoe, but the two pairs I brought from home don't fit. We bought her a pair of size 3 red squeaky shoes on Thursday, and while they are a bit big, they work.

8. She is getting more and more curious by the day. This is fun to watch, even when she is trying to squeeze my nose off my face, poking me in the eye, pulling on my hair, and shoving her fingers in my mouth and pulling down on my lower jaw.

9. She loves to stand if you hold her hands and dance with her. I sing her "Shake Your Groove Thing" in honor of Mya, Cheryl and Bruce's daughter. I also sing her "Dancing Queen".

10. It's pretty clear I have been replaced as the girl that SK loves the most. And that's just fine with me.

Tomorrow, we are off to Guangzhou. I want a hamburger. Badly.

Bella with the laughing face.

Playing in the mirror with Baba.

Swimming Girl.

Chongqing Zoo

The Girl Likes Baths.

A message from Isabella to her Grandma Karen and Grandpa Royal in Minnesota:
I want a jacuzzi bath when I come to visit you in January. Got it?

Sleeping Beauty.

Baby Watching Traffic.

The Chinese people are fascinated by us Caucasian folks with Chinese babies. Seriously fascinated...whether they are young or old, male or female. Today a few of the families in our travel group walked to a shopping area in Chongqing for baby supplies, and sometimes foot traffic came to a stand still as a crowd began to form around the babies. It's surreal. Most of the onlookers seem very friendly. Some look bewildered. Some think we need to cover up our already sweaty babies more. I've taken to draping a blanket over the bar of the stroller, or around Bella in the Hip Hammock to avoid being scolded.

The Toddfather says goodbye...for now.

Todd left Chongqing for Chicago today. It was hard to say goodbye. Here are some pictures of a very special person with his very special niece.











The lovely Chongqing lady in the picture above is one of our guides, Mei.

Todd, we love you!

Keep your eye on the stacking cups.

Ni Hao from China.

Random Bits and Pieces.

That's how my thoughts come right now. Bam. Bam. Bam., with the background a general thoughtless buzzing.

My adoption agency rocks. Seriously, you don't have to think about anything except your baby and how to deal with your aching back.

On the back...it's better. I am not sure if the reason is:
A.) taking it easy the second day in Beijing, not being allowed to carry ANYTHING then and on the flight to Chongqing, and multiple hot compresses helped it tremendously

B.) pure adrenaline has kicked in and I need to care for, hold, and rock my baby and that's it, so my mind, body and soul have somehow sent my back spasms packing and just let the constant ache hang around

or

C.) a bit of both. I suspect it's C. Nonetheless, I am still taking my prescription muscle relaxants. The problem with this is that I cannot take ibuprofen with these, and we are flat out of Tylenol. Today we asked our guide about acetaminophen and another couple asked about ibuprofen. Here was her paraphrased response, according to SK:

Guide: Well, those things aren't generally available in grocery stores. Most people in China, when they get a headache, they just deal with it. And drugs like that you have to get at a pharmacy, which usually means a doctor has sent you there, and you have to explain everything, etc.

My personal translation of above: Wimpy Americans. Do you really think I should have to lead this whiny group to yet another place for someone's personal needs? Especially when you all seem unwilling to risk life and limb by just walking into a crazy busy Chongqing city street? And why do you all walk so slow anyway? No wonder you are all so fat.

(***Seriously, no one in our travel group is very fat. Or even that whiny for that matter. They are basically all nice people. But still, I'd love to see our guide's inner thoughts on us. My guess is that they would be spicy, and maybe not in a good way***).

In a very nice effort, our guide did take us to a pharmacy, where nothing was labeled in English (What?! The nerve of a Chinese pharmacy having drugs only labeled in Chinese!) and most things weren't easily recognizable. The couple got their ibuprofen, but there was no acetaminophen to be had.

So, I have a few back-ups plans, one of which I will have to implement given the LONG flight home...

a. Guard remaining two prescription Vicodin with my life.

b. Go online and see if drugstore.com will ship to China for some amount less than our total adoption expenses OR call up BFF Carla with a list of needs. ask her to go shopping and overnight stuff to me (Carla, this is a warning. You may want to change your phone numbers, email address, and move. Oh wait, I'll still know how to find you. I'll just call the mall and Home Depot).

c. Bum stuff off fellow travel group members (Some of which has already gone on. One couple gave us these heat belts, which can wrap around various parts of your body and produce heat for 8 hours! Oh My God. I want to marry the heat belt. Of course, this couple are now hurting themselves after receiving a very chunky daughter. They probably hate me now because my sad state stirred them to give me some very precious items. Did I mention I want to marry the heat belt?)

Seriously though, on Saturday, Sunday, and Monday in Beijing, I said some very desperate prayers. I am a believer, but not a formal one. What I mean is that I've always believed that a relationship with God is a very personal, come as you are, kind of thing. In other words, my prayers are more like conversations, where I pretty much sound like me, rather than some more pious version of me. So, this prayer went something like this "Man, I cannot believe I could want to be a mother this bad, and have to wait so long, only to not be able to hold my baby. Nope, cannot believe that. Also, I cannot believe you want a bewildered, grieving, innocent baby to hear this stranger who's now her mother to drop the F-bomb about a hundred times a day as she writhes in agony or to see the stranger who is now her mama gripping her now baba's hand for dear life, walking gingerly and slowly with, to quote my BIL, "waves of pain" radiating from her body. Nope. So PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE cut me some slack here. I don't care what challenges lie ahead as we get to know Isabella and she us, but LET ME HOLD MY BABY". Of course, when bad things happen, I don't blame God, but when good things happen when I really NEED them to, I like to think I'm being helped out, since I don't believe I am just that lucky. So, thanks, big guy. And BTW, as I later found out even SK said a prayer, so thanks from him too. SK is lousy at thank you notes, as anyone who has given us a gift or helped us out in some way has probably noticed.

And finally...a good reason to password protect a blog once we return...two people have approached me, one of whom said, in a hotel elevator, with no prelude, "Are you Tammy Murphy?" Yep, it kinda freaked me out, because I don't have a blog that gets a ton of hits. And of course, I would probably do the same thing if I saw a blogger that I had followed and I happened to be in China at the same time as he or she. And the people who approached me were very nice. Nonetheless.

It's now time for Bella's midnight bottle. Cross your fingers that she cooperates.

We are three.

OK, so I know you all want to kill me for not posting sooner. All I can say is we've been pretty focused on the little one, and we are completely smitten. I've never been as happy about anything in my life as I am about this.

We received Bella at about 3:45 PM on Monday. The Forever Family moment came very quickly...I don't think we were at the Civil Affairs Office more than 15 minutes before we had her in our arms. All 7 families in our travel group received their babies in about a 15 minute time span. She didn't cry much at all during the actual passing of her from the SWI director's arms to mine...I think she was calm because she had no idea what was happening to her, as her caregiver was still in the room.
Her caregiver seemed very fond of FuXun, and described FuXun as active, equally happy playing with others or alone, and very fond of bright toys, especially the color red. She also said that FuXun likes to steal other children's toys! I know I shouldn't encourage such behavior, but I have to say that this made me laugh-and laugh hard. We received our disposable camera back, but not the list of questions or anything else we had included in the care package. I am grateful for the camera, and look forward to developing it soon. Our guide has also provided us with copy of her finding ad.

Bella is the smallest baby in the travel group, at 7.0 kilograms (15.43 pounds). At 9.5 months, she is on the younger side, but not the youngest (there are a few babies born later in December 2006). She has a little rash, which the doctor traveling with us said will probably go away by keeping her cool and applying a little baby lotion on the area.

The doctor mentioned that she has delicate features and looks just like me, which I took as a huge compliment. However, he also thought that I had a Southern accent! Mmm.

SK is completely in love with his little girl. It makes me fall in love with my husband all over again every time I watch them together. I've never loved him more. We made our dreams of parenthood come true together.

The first night was rough. She was overtired and would not eat. I ended up dropping some formula into her mouth with the medicine dropper because she was so tired, so overheated, and so unwilling to eat. She was crying and screaming, but with no tears, and we feared dehydration. At midnight, she turned a corner, and accepted a bottle of formula. I don't think we've ever been so relieved in our lives. She then slept, and had another few ounces at 4am.

Today has been a great day. It's as though she accepted (at least for now) that she needs to let us care for her and that we are happy to do it. In the morning, we went shopping in the city, buying some formula, diapers, and a Chinese bottle. I carried her in the Playtex Hip Hammock, which she loved and which John and LaSalette lent us (thank you!). SK and I had tried the Ergo that Sparky was kind enough to lend us, but I don't think it fits Bella and me together that well. I am eager to try it again, but for now she seems to prefer the Hip Hammock. She just chilled and slept while we went about our business. We are a sight on the streets of Chongqing City...it was unbelievable how much attention we attracted. Some of the attention was clothing police related (Bella was in a short sleeved dress and socks), but most attention was quite positive. The most touching thing was several "thumbs up" signs from elderly Chinese people.

This afternoon, we returned to the Civil Affairs Office, and had our family photo and fingerprints taken. Our family photo is actually fairly nice, which is amazing given that it was taken in about 5 seconds and the photographer had to wake Bella up for it. We received our "Red Book" certificate and a beautiful Ruyi Golden Plate as a memento for Bella of her home city. SK had Bella in the Hip Hammock all afternoon and she did well.

SK and I take turns with changing diapers and feeding (although somehow I have lucked out and gotten the two poopy diapers she's had so far. Hmmm.) I don't see her having a preference for one parent over the other yet. I hope it stays that way.

We are not sure she has shown us everything she can do, but here's what we do know. She has smiled several times. She has 4 teeth (two lower, two upper) and is teething. She could care less about stuffed animals, but loves the plastic keys, the stacking cups, the Taggies Click and Twist toy, and the link, crinkly duck toy Aunt Tina gave her for Christmas 2005. She can prop herself up, roll over on both sides, and crawl across the bed. She cannot quite sit up by herself yet. She has a very "floppy head" and is particularly fond of throwing it back and screaming...the classic arching-the-back, get-away-from-me, behavior. She has trouble with prolonged eye contact, but looks at you directly, then slyly looks away and will steal glances at you when she thinks you are not looking. She does look at me a lot when she is in the Hip Hammock. She is fascinated by my hair and the one necklace I brought with me to wear. And, she loves looking at herself in the mirror (clearly taking after SK there)! So we do a lot of holding, cuddling, and stroking while holding her in front of the mirror. It is also a surefire way to calm her when she cries or fusses, as is MOTION. The girl loves MOTION. Rock her, bounce her, walk with her...it's all good and you better not stop!

It has been a real joy having Todd here with us. He is so easy to be with, and is so interested in all things China and all things Bella. He did an amazing job video taping our Forever Family moment yesterday...hopefully we'll be able to share that soon.

For now, I should run. The bottom line...we love, love, love her and our Forever Family lifetime has begun.

She still has "the look".

It's 1:00 PM here, and SK and I completed some paperwork earlier in the hotel conference room. We saw an updated photo of our daughter pasted to one document; this will likely be the same photo used for her Chinese passport. I am happy to report that she still has the determined, "don't mess with me" look. And more hair! In 3 hours, we should see her in the flesh! The doctor that is traveling with us will examine all the babies in the travel group later today.

SK and I took a little walk after the paperwork. A lot of people looked at us like we are aliens, which we are, here in Chongqing.

Thanks for all the tips regarding the back issues. I did have some muscle relaxants and Vicodin with me from previous flare-ups, which believe me, I have used. I am saving my last few Vicodin for the part of the flight home were I might be able to sleep while SK cares for Isabella. Now I am on muscle relaxants and Tylenol. I do think things are improving.

And now, we are off to lunch! Our last meal as a couple...for our next meal, we'll be a family.

Dudes, there is a crib in our hotel room!

Also a stroller and a baby bath tube! Unbelievable!!! We have made it to Chongqing. At 3:00 PM today, we will go to be united with our babies. It is finally going to happen. We are excited, a bit nervous, but most of all, just incredibly happy.

The flight from Chicago to Beijing was pretty grueling...tougher than I thought it would be, honestly. My back stiffened up and then I threw it completely out climbing the Great Wall. So, it has been a painful trip for me, in the sense that any jarring or transitions from sitting/standing/lying down set off these muscle spasms. SK has had to be a nursemaid. I do think things are getting better...I am not in so much pain that I am tearing up, as I was the first few days. And I even put my own panties on today, by myself! (Sadly,this is a great improvement). All I can think of is wanting to be my best self when I meet our girl, and this ain't it. But we are coping. And I have once again been struck at how SK can really step up to the plate when he needs to. I am a lucky girl.

We arrived on Friday, and had a group dinner, then we were all off to bed. On Saturday, we went to a jade factory on the way to the Great Wall. We bought Bella a jade dog, since she is a Year of the Dog baby. Very cute. Then it was off to the Great Wall, where unfortunately, I did very little climbing before feeling my back yank. However, SK and Todd took off and impressed the travel group with their stamina. One fellow adoptive parent asked SK "Do you run?", at which I collapsed into a laughing fit. It was painful, but worth it.

Sunday's activities were the Forbidden Palace, Tienanmen Square, and a rickshaw ride through the older part of Beijing, with lunch at a local family home. SK and I had to skip these activities; we took a car directly from the hotel to the airport for our flight to Chongqing. However, Todd went along with the group, and really enjoyed himself. The group seemed particularly enthusiastic about the rickshaw ride and lunch. We had a late flight to Chongqing, arriving at our hotel, the Holiday Inn, between 9pm and 10pm. There was a very good buffet dinner waiting for us, and then it was off to bed. This hotel is very, very nice, and has a children's playroom.

Today's agenda is breakfast, some paperwork in the hotel conference room at 11 AM, and then we depart the hotel at 3 PM to head to the Civil Affairs Office for our children. Apparently, there are going to be LOTS of adoptive families there (only 7 in our group, but we have heard there are 50 families with another group), so we are not sure how long we will be there. But we are getting back on that bus with our daughter. It doesn't get any better than that.

I was a little too smug.

On Sunday, I weighed my suitcase. I was at 35 pounds, and feeling great. All I had to add was my remaining clothes (a few shirts, underwear, few pairs of socks, a nice cardigan sweater)and my tolietries. So I did that and re-weighed my suitcase. 50 LBS!!! How did that happen?!

OK, some confessions. I refuse to bring less than one pair of panties per day. REFUSE! I know there are laundry services, etc., but there are somethings you just don't want to mess around with. Also, I am not a woman with a fancy hairdo (no hair dryers, curling irons, straightening irons, brushes, etc.), but I am a woman who is obsessive about skin care. I'll attribute that to a.) being quite fair and b.) being allergic to a lot of products. So I am pretty fussy about facial cleansers, facial moisturizers, etc.

I am pretty sure the tolietries are my downfall. SK and I agreed that we wanted our suitcases to weigh 40 pounds when we left in case our scale differs from the airport scales. We don't want to be the ones in the group that force all of us to pay an overweight baggage charge.

Out went the inflatable tub (as my friend Cheryl predicted), the nice but heavy cardigan, one travel size bottle of Listerine, a travel size bottle of facial toner, and a fourth pair of pants. I am down to 44 pounds, but do want to get to 40 pounds.

I'll be the woman in China with the bad skin that's wearing either a hoodie or a nylon pullover jacket when I am cold, even if it's a dressy occassion. But then again, this trip is not about me.

One week.

One week from today, we will have our daughter in our arms. This is actually going to happen!

I wish I had something coherent to say. SK and I are both in our offices this morning...SK won't be back in his for a month, and I won't be back in mine until November, when I do internship candidate interviews for the spring semester internship program. Wow.

I drove to work today with a car seat in my car. How wild is that?
(Note to Subaru Forester owners...having a Britax Decathalon installed rear-facing in your back seat is not an easy feat.)

We are mostly packed. All my clothes are going to have to be placed in a thin layer on the top of all the baby supplies, medicines, and clothes. I will not be looking good on this trip. When I place my carry-on backpack on my back, I am probably going to topple over.

Isabella's clothes, bedding, and curtains are all freshly washed with Dreft. My dear friend Carla put up the room-darkening shades in the baby's room yesterday. She also ironed the baby's curtains and crib dust ruffle, and I caught her ironing a onesie. Crazy lady.

I may not get a chance to post before we depart on Thursday...Boston to Chicago, where we will meet up with my favorite brother-in-law, the Toddfather (otherwise known as the Pack Mule), and then Chicago to Beijing. This is actually going to happen. I've decided to try and keep the blog going during the trip. Mostly because I've been too lazy to set up the by-invitation-only one. I'll set that up when we return. We will finally stop being a waiting family, and just become a family. Wow.

I want to thank everyone who has been following us as we realize our dream of becoming parents. I've enjoyed your comments tremendously. We've also met some amazing people through this blog (particularly the Sparky, Anne, Kikalee and Deb families). Along with becoming a family with the addition of our daughter, we have also become part of an extended circle of family and friends.

I feel very blessed right now.

They have no idea how much their little doggie worlds are about to change...